For me and others like me, personality (think “introvert” on the Myers-Briggs) and spirituality intersect, and I can only be myself: a person who loves humanity deeply but can find it difficult to love the person next to me in a crowded elevator, crowded party, or crowded concert. In fact, it is rare to find me at a crowded anything. Fun and exciting for some equals loud and overwhelming to others.
Think about it this way. After you've been here a few times, you've gathered life experiences and met all sorts of different types of people. You've tried out different lifestyles yourself: rich and poor, male and female, this country or that country in whatever historical period. You have “been there and done that.” You're the spiritual equivalent of an old person. There isn't much that you haven't seen or experienced directly. Your an older soul, maybe even an Old Soul.
Therefore, your need to be social can be limited. All our souls require is for us to fulfill our spiritual mission in each life. What if you're near the end of your Earth missions and mostly what's left is to know yourself and God/Goddess/Universe completely?
The older soul also typically desires to burn off karma, rather than create new karma. One way to look at the cycle of birth, death and rebirth, is that when you get toward the end of your development here, you don't want to create a bunch more karma with people that needs to be repaid, and you especially want to avoid situations where you allow others to create karmic debts to you. As an older soul you might feel obligated to come back simply to help others repay their debts or to assist in their spiritual development. A more detached perspective can come naturally to the Hermit. Certainly, among other spiritual practices, Buddhism specifically teaches detachment.
Now, gregarious and outgoing people can be older souls too—as their life lessons require them to be so. Such outgoing folks are spiritually developed, but they are not likely to experience being called out over being too social.
So if you'd rather stay home and read a book on a Saturday, I get you, my Sister or Brother! I've got your back, and I know you've got mine. Stop judging yourself for not being a party animal and needing copious amounts of Quiet Time to recharge and think your thoughts. Be aware though that you can only allow yourself to get just so Hermit-y before you might get to a scary place you cannot get back from. Life is also about balance and not scaring people who love you.
To all you lovely extroverts out there: when your Hermit best friend shows up at your party, take it for the compliment and testament to your friend's love for you that it is. Even if you love nothing better than to gather a huge group together to have fun, try to plan a little one-on-one time with your Hermit. That's what Hermits like best. Chances are, though, that if you have a Hermit bestie, you already know this.
It's easier to achieve our life's goals, whether practical, material, emotional or social, when we're not all tangled up inside about how or who we are. Hermits on are on to something, for by tuning out the world they free up resources for inner development. Too much outward focus on relationships keeps us preoccupied with the world instead of developing inner Self. We may all run, but we cannot hide forever from the need to embrace our inner Hermit to develop the gifts of the Self.
Until next time, my friends...